Suggestion
If you wish to avoid gold diggers, then do not shower Thai ladies with money and take care of them to where they can be lazy. That’s really asking for it.
Suggestion #1: If she helps you, then help her.
If a lady helps herself and tries to improve her life, then it’s good pay for her higher education, but only if she’s a good student, really. Same with business. But only help people who wish to improve their life, really, and who help you improve yours. It’s a two-way dynamic, both spiritually and in terms of local business/support responsibility.
Suggestion #2: Consider whether you care about your respectability in Thai society.
If you are going to circulate within the higher class Thai community, and bring your Thai girlfriend or wife, then you must have a middle to high class Thai girlfriend. Thais are much more class sensitive than farangs. The minimum would be a Thai girlfriend with 12 years education. University studies or degree would be better, and/or good business job experience. If you don’t fulfill these requirements, then your business and Thai social life may fail, too.
Suggestion #3: How important is beauty in your wish list of traits in a lady?
The pretty ladies tend to be the worst. Not all, but many. Life has been easy for them, as people have treated them favorably over others. They are often spoiled. In a way, beauty can be a curse in that beautiful people have a lot of external influences and many don’t learn to develop themselves internally — “make themselves” — in substantive ways. (When they get older, past their youthful beastliness, their happiness often goes down. They experience transient rather than substantive fulfillment in life. Beauty is superficial. Doors will be opened in their young life, but in life, the most important doors you must find yourself, with your own effort.)
A pretty, “trophy wife” can have a lot of drawbacks.
Suggestion #4: Assess her money needs, and decide whether you are willing to fulfill them.
After pretty spoiled women, next on my danger list is accountants. Again, most, not all. They tend to be materialistic and very money conscious, and thus look to milk a man and push him to work harder to make more money. I’m not a very materialistic person, and I value my free time, so accountants are not for me. However, they are a good match for other men. And some are great for family businesses. I don’t want to berate all accountants because I know some real good ladies who are responsible and highly competent businesspeople, as well as great wives. However, I know a larger number of gold-diggers who push men for all they can get and just seem lacking in other qualities.
Suggestion #5: Have they matured enough for you?
University students sometimes see a guy as a sugar daddy, a substitute for their father taking care of them. They sometimes haven’t been on their own long enough (if at all) and sometimes lack some of the important elements of maturity. The main attraction of some university students are intellectual vitality and an open-ended career path. They aren’t as locked into many older peoples’ habits of thought, and tend to be a little more open-minded. Some university students come from poor backgrounds, and the need for financial support from a farang boyfriend vs. their poor family is understandable. However, the relationship should be more expansive than just sugar daddy support.
I can only recommend that you be very careful who you try to help, and don’t expect a “company girlfriend” relationship to help in terms of work. Sometimes it will help, if she likes to help you, but don’t fall for those who see sex as a substitute for work.
In general, do not mix work and personal relationships. A flirt can be a bad sign. I’m absolutely sure there are good exceptions to this rule and my experiences above, but I would bet that more people have had experiences like mine above than have had a girlfriend become more motivated to help your business succeed. So, in general, “Don’t fish at the company pier.”
Don’t feel sorry for everyone in a rote, low paying job. If they’re not working hard in rote jobs, then they will be watching TV, so their purpose in life is rote jobs for the economy. There’s usually a reason they’re in a rote job — they didn’t have initiative elsewhere. Maybe rote jobs just dull people out, and once they’re out of school and into a rote job, they’re in a rut. At first, I thought that you either get them while they’re still a student, or else it’s too late. However, my experience with students hasn’t been much better.
