If they have a strategy, then it is to sit at house and check out TV all day, news with their friends, and shop.

If you anticipate them to prepare unique meals for you or do other thoughtful elements — for them to put out the same stage of attempt for you that you put out for them — then you’re usually establishing yourself up for frustration. Actually, you will be fortunate if they can even control the house maid and obtain the regard of one for time.

I should say that there are exclusions, as I know folks who have spouse and associates who are grateful, persistent and more than generate their keep. (Sometimes I wonder if the guy warrants the lady!)

However, the excellent circumstances are far outweighed in large statistics by the irresponsible women.

Over time, a guy becomes more and more doubtful about women who communicate a desire to create a profession substitute to prostitution. Is it just simple discuss, “at the moment”? That is the concern to take care of.

For some time, I offered them credit for having the guts to project out into farangland to be able to grow their capabilities. However, more often than not, it’s just to discover someone to aid their sluggish, extra calm way of life, and take them away for some interesting and no cost (indeed, successful for them) holiday activities.

You can put in a lot of attempt, cash to help them, but when you need it in come back, will they offer you a lot of persistence to help you?

Don’t try to create them into something they are not. They are expert pleasers, and they will please your need to try to help them, but most of them won’t help you again. When time comes, after they’ve pulled you dry, they will just throw you out, often considerably … more often than not.

If unhappiness adores organization, the let it be known that I’ve known folks who have missing an incredible number of baht ($25,000+), some their whole nest egg, all valuable and stored. Beyond individuals I’ve known, I’ve also observed of folks who have missing TENS of an incredible number of baht. One guy wed the woman and purchased a insurance plan coverage coverage, determining her as the successor. Her household compromised him to loss of life (not very smartly, either) to be able to maintain the cash. Thus, he missing not just his cash, but basically missing his life.

If you have put in a lot of cash into a woman and have been attractive off, then be cautious about trying to get any of it again, considering the possible problems of this search.

Be pleased for what you’ve got, and your own choices in life.

Rose has been studying a difficult topic in a university, was studious (as I have repeatedly observed) was oh-so-close to graduation, and few friends of mine revealed that her notes were pretty good. It was actually a good student. I thought if there was a prostitute who I could help out the company and Rose was her.

I went and paid her tuition for her, gave her some money to do it for a while, and e-mail gave him a list of calls for information to which it could do its own schedule.

Unfortunately, the calls did not happened. She called me very kindly when she needed more money, and money seemed to go too fast. I knew that the other students that extended far beyond money. Rose was just a few months of graduation, if it has just passed his last (and hardest) classes, and with his degree and notes that she could immediately get a good paying job. With some excuses, I gave him a second chance. However, around two of the business had a few calls but was then released, without worrying about my business.

It was just another lady who was good at asking for help, but was not willing to help me in return. Big talk, no implementation. Talk is easy …

The next time Rose called, I specifically raised these principles with it. She said she was sorry, but I said I’m sorry, too, and not “wages” until it does its job. I gave him another chance – when the work is done satisfactorily, then the salary is pending. His answer? A pleading, but more aggressive “please do not do this for me, I have no money, what do I do now, Boo-hoo-hoo, s’ Now you do not like, the worst time possible, I have only 45 baht now and I was depending on you, I must finish my classes … “bits.

Just hours before her call, a customer called me to pay me 2500 baht he owed me, but wanted me to go pick it up and sign a receipt with his accountant. I would not spend the time to make a special trip if I had a “one day when I’m in the” type of arrangement. However, I called back and he agreed that this lady could go collect the money and sign for it.

The office was just a roadside air-conditioned bus from his apartment Ramkamhaeng, perhaps a trip of 30 minutes and 14 baht per trip. I called her and told her that if she went to get the baht in 2500, when she could keep it all and had enough money for a little longer until it can perform other tasks that I had given him. She said OK, but not as happy as I expected. A few hours later, I called the customer but reported no sign of her. So I called her back. She had not disappeared, seemed lazy, and at that time, she asked me to get money and bring it to her!

Alu was ok and tried to run her own business selling clothes in Nice, with the ultimate ambition of garments for export and other things the hard work. She had beautiful styles itself, clearly a sort of art. She also had a complete high school and started college but dropped out soon after. Its declared purpose was the lack of money.

I had a customer who was upgrading their computers and CAD

was a pile of idle Pentium I and 14 inch monitors. (This was years ago.)

Alu had expressed interest in improving their computer / Windows / enterprise software expertise, so I bought a customer for cheap, spent time reformatting and setting it up for it with a good software, purchased books for her, delivered everything and helped her get started with a few personal lessons. However, when I was not there, it did nothing more than writing emails to guys. She made no progress on our strategy. Every time I would stop by the expectations gay, I would be disappointed to find its just sitting around trash TV shows. Checking the computer, it had only emails, visited the online games, and things other wastes. The only questions asked was how we could get the computer to play video games in 3D.

I discussed my problems smoothly, but it was just quiet and nice, always friendly and made ​​plans for tomorrow, but never executed. After a few weeks ago, I just dumping “project”. Soon after, she was back in the clubs without money.

Jice

Jice was just like Alu in mentioned ambitions. A companion sent her to BCC (Business and Computers). Unfortunately, he had to force her out the entrance to get there on time, as she didn’t have a look at out time. When he wasn’t there, she missed category.

Guys out of city get testimonies from the women that they are joining sessions, but having a personal eye have a look at up on them shows that many do not. Actually, some go back and get a partially return of their expenses.

Listen to these GUYS. Make your own opinion, but do not listen, and look for warning signs.

Hearing many of their stories, I soon see their mistakes from the start, and an excuse to be new to Thailand. On the other hand, I have learned some painful lessons several times in my nine years here. Every time I raised my level to help people.

I really do not be negative, and I hope that my experience was unfortunate, but let me share with you my experiences.

First, unlike some other foreigners, I’m not saying women what to do, or lead ladies too. I do not do that with anyone. For example, when people I interview for a job, I have to see the initiative on their part, and I hire only those who express the initiative.

I am guilty of lowering my standards when it comes to helping a lady get off the streets. I was also wrong to think they enjoy it and try to help me back. The same applies to some of my friends.

Let’s review some of our experiences.

I changed the names to protect the not-so-innocent.

Noot

Noot was smart and had a lot of energy. She could not speak English well and could read and write pretty well, too. It could be by email. Noot dragged through the bars open beer in the air, but I never saw her flirting with men. She talked more with other women, a joker, and people just looked back and forth without any interaction with men. She was a friend who was a little interesting to talk to, but not someone have sex with, and I made it clear that I had no sexual interest in her. (It is pretty nice, anyway, but just not my type.) She expressed that she did not go with men, but she could not get a job to make enough money to support her needs, hes son (foreign father is long gone and she hated him for that) and paralyzed father.

She asked about me, and I explained my business . She expressed interest in helping me, including giving solutions to some problems I had. I was quite impressed. She seemed perfect for a special role. I just had street racing for her to do to start, his first test, but she was happy with that, as she needed a break financial.

She had sold her mobile phone for the money, but had an active SIM card, so I gave her an old mobile phone of mine, and since she was only 78 baht credit, I also have a map charging 300 baht, and gave him a little spending money to eat and usually for several days. (I thought it would take a day to his test.) I told him to wait for my calls.

I immediately sent a text message on her way home that night with a task for the next day. The next day, at the end of the day when I had a little time, I called to see how she does. She had not completed the task, and did not want to talk about the SMS. She just wanted to meet me to talk more about the opportunity to work for me. What did she do that day? She had nothing to report, and pressing the issue, I think she had sitting around the house.

I felt she wanted to meet just to put pressure on me in the face to face for more money. I’ve heard this before. However, I had already invested too much of my time thinking about it, and I wanted some answers to some questions about his past. I noted them on a cushion, preparing for an interview. I had nothing to lose, and if the interview went wrong and she just asked for money when I get my phone back.

I decided to meet in a quiet place outside the bars, and set a specific location in a pleasant cafe. It would be a 30 minute ride to her in traffic.

However, while she complains to meet me halfway. It was a cheap bus ride on a main road from his house, but she complains of a taxi, and in a tone as if she was looking for excuses not to go. She wanted me to come all the way to it. Then, as I mentioned, she just started yelling at someone else, does not give me his attention. I felt violated, and in response my tone was more discipline, indicating to her that if she wanted to work with me, then she would need to be more professional. She lost her self-control and started screaming at me about how I let her down and shouted “f *** you!” Twice in the phone and hangs up. (Ten minutes later, she called me, but I had declined to work with my other employees and did not bother to respond.)

Maybe hes explosiveness is why her boyfriend left her for farang friends (and now ex-friend).

I still feel sorry for her, but she had her chance with me and it blew. There are many other people in this world who I can give a chance to, and are more sustainable, profitable and mutually beneficial.

However, these are the exceptions to the rule. Far more commonly, a nice guy puts out all the effort, and money, and gets burned in the end by an ungrateful and lazy bum of a lady who carelessly does things to piss off their husband/boyfriend (e.g., neglectful of his needs and/or blows money despite budget arguments and/or is unfaithful). When it comes time to part ways, she takes all she can get and makes his life miserable, in a most ungrateful manner.

When you’re a guy in Thailand who starts talking with prostitutes, you find a few who say clearly that they do not want to do what they are doing, but they have no money, no skill, and few alternatives. You want to help, feeling that they’ve just had bad luck in life.

Many of these ladies are quite pleasant and calm. Others have a lot of energy and hustle at what they do. Some even have considerable education, e.g., are attending the university and supporting themselves by “working” on men at discos.

I’m an entrepreneur with 16 years of continuous self-employment and hiring people. I can always find something profitable for people to do in order to sustain themselves in society, including Thais from top to bottom. However, after several attempts at hiring university level ladies who asked me to hire them out of prostitution, and other freelancer down the skills scale, for anything from running messenger errands around town (low education), to answering the phone and making simple phone calls (medium education), to simple computer tasks (university level), I now must agree with my predecessors in this regard — you will almost surely get burned.

The following describes some of my experiences. I have had 0% success with hiring ladies of the night who ask for and agree to a job, though admittedly it’s a sample of less than 10, and I gave up a long time ago in view of alternative sources of hiring such as word of mouth in my Thai communities. However, I know a lot of good guys who have tried the same thing. The success of my associates is also pretty close to zero.

We always offer them more money than what other Thais are eager to work for, wage levels and job descriptions that many self-disciplined Thais would consider fortunate to get. However, the freelance prostitutes fail to be nearly as reliable or do acceptable quality of service. Fortunately, we usually don’t even have to fire them. They just don’t show up for work after awhile … that is, they don’t show up at the office, but they do show up at the discos again.

In considering “saving” a prostitute, guys lower their expectations for the lady’s standard of work and professionality, and dramatically up the salary and fringe benefits.

I am sure that there are some prostitutes out there who would do a good job if given an opportunity, and be very appreciative. However, they are a very small percent, and I haven’t met them in all my years here.

(If you want to know why the go-go bars are so strict and “cruel” by deducting a baht per minute for late ladies, and strict in enforcing that rule, this is why. As bar owners have told me, it’s the only way to get them to work on time. Some companies have adopted this policy for professional employees, too.)

First, they usually don’t show up for work on time, if at all. Secondly, if they do show up, then they aren’t as good a worker as others, and often do careless work. You care for them, but they don’t care much for your business and your clients. Why should you care any more?

In the end:

• You have wasted effort, money and precious time
• Your employees are laughing at you, the boss, for being a stupid farang (but some of them also admittedly learned to be less foolhearty themselves)
• Some things you expected to get done in your business did not

If you wish to avoid gold diggers, then do not shower Thai ladies with money and take care of them to where they can be lazy. That’s really asking for it.

Suggestion #1: If she helps you, then help her.

If a lady helps herself and tries to improve her life, then it’s good pay for her higher education, but only if she’s a good student, really. Same with business. But only help people who wish to improve their life, really, and who help you improve yours. It’s a two-way dynamic, both spiritually and in terms of local business/support responsibility.

Suggestion #2: Consider whether you care about your respectability in Thai society.

If you are going to circulate within the higher class Thai community, and bring your Thai girlfriend or wife, then you must have a middle to high class Thai girlfriend. Thais are much more class sensitive than farangs. The minimum would be a Thai girlfriend with 12 years education. University studies or degree would be better, and/or good business job experience. If you don’t fulfill these requirements, then your business and Thai social life may fail, too.

Suggestion #3: How important is beauty in your wish list of traits in a lady?

The pretty ladies tend to be the worst. Not all, but many. Life has been easy for them, as people have treated them favorably over others. They are often spoiled. In a way, beauty can be a curse in that beautiful people have a lot of external influences and many don’t learn to develop themselves internally — “make themselves” — in substantive ways. (When they get older, past their youthful beastliness, their happiness often goes down. They experience transient rather than substantive fulfillment in life. Beauty is superficial. Doors will be opened in their young life, but in life, the most important doors you must find yourself, with your own effort.)

A pretty, “trophy wife” can have a lot of drawbacks.

Suggestion #4: Assess her money needs, and decide whether you are willing to fulfill them.

After pretty spoiled women, next on my danger list is accountants. Again, most, not all. They tend to be materialistic and very money conscious, and thus look to milk a man and push him to work harder to make more money. I’m not a very materialistic person, and I value my free time, so accountants are not for me. However, they are a good match for other men. And some are great for family businesses. I don’t want to berate all accountants because I know some real good ladies who are responsible and highly competent businesspeople, as well as great wives. However, I know a larger number of gold-diggers who push men for all they can get and just seem lacking in other qualities.

Suggestion #5: Have they matured enough for you?

University students sometimes see a guy as a sugar daddy, a substitute for their father taking care of them. They sometimes haven’t been on their own long enough (if at all) and sometimes lack some of the important elements of maturity. The main attraction of some university students are intellectual vitality and an open-ended career path. They aren’t as locked into many older peoples’ habits of thought, and tend to be a little more open-minded. Some university students come from poor backgrounds, and the need for financial support from a farang boyfriend vs. their poor family is understandable. However, the relationship should be more expansive than just sugar daddy support.

I can only recommend that you be very careful who you try to help, and don’t expect a “company girlfriend” relationship to help in terms of work. Sometimes it will help, if she likes to help you, but don’t fall for those who see sex as a substitute for work.

In general, do not mix work and personal relationships. A flirt can be a bad sign. I’m absolutely sure there are good exceptions to this rule and my experiences above, but I would bet that more people have had experiences like mine above than have had a girlfriend become more motivated to help your business succeed. So, in general, “Don’t fish at the company pier.”

Don’t feel sorry for everyone in a rote, low paying job. If they’re not working hard in rote jobs, then they will be watching TV, so their purpose in life is rote jobs for the economy. There’s usually a reason they’re in a rote job — they didn’t have initiative elsewhere. Maybe rote jobs just dull people out, and once they’re out of school and into a rote job, they’re in a rut. At first, I thought that you either get them while they’re still a student, or else it’s too late. However, my experience with students hasn’t been much better.

Once she thinks she’s “got him” (after the first few weeks, maybe a month or so), she expects him to take care of her, while she does less and less to take care of him … or herself. She sits around watching TV, yacking on the phone with friends, and reading trash magazines. On Internet, she doesn’t do valuable things but wastes time on surfing elsewhere, e-mail with worthless friends and chat. Trivial fun is fine, and everyone does it themself just like everyone else. But not all the time. It must be mixed with worthwhile, fulfilling activities.

Daily life changes. The man has to take the initiative on things to do together, much moreso than her. After the first few weeks, he starts doing the following more often than her: Cooking for the two of them. Cleaning the dishes and the place. Remembering the deadlines for getting the trash out to the street. Taking care of the accounting and bills. Working (if she works for him), making most of the decisions, taking the initiatives, and then quality control of her half-careless work. What’s happening is she’s starting to rely on him to “take care” of her, excessively, while she slips on taking care of him.

He hires a maid, and that further promotes laziness while taking away a test of the strength of her caring. (However, if she works a job, then you should hire a maid rather than make her come home and work a second job.)

After all that, if he gets irritated, she will shape up … for a day or two. Then back to the old ways. Sometimes she will say she loves him. He will ask her why. What does she love in him? The usual answer is that she doesn’t know, she just does. He will tell her to show her. Talk is easy. No, not just a temporary physical expression.

As a farang in Thailand, I often help Thais in farang matters (carefully explaining things, translating, showing things), and ask those who I help to in turn help me out on occasion. Some do, and others find excuses not to. (Same when I help farangs.) I find the same things happen to many men in relationships with Thai women — they help the woman more than vice versa.

I believe that this is not a general trait of Thai ladies. I just think that Thai ladies who are looking for a man mainly for financial support, security, material things and an exciting lifestyle tend to seek out foreign men.

When you analyze the relationship, there is little in regard to similar values and interests. That’s why it fails.

What usually happens is that the two people get bored with each other. She sticks around for financial support. He keeps her around for convenience. But temptations pull on both of them.

One finds an alternative mate before the other and leaves. It’s always easier to be the dumper than the dumpee, despite the low quality of the relationship.

Sometimes, it reaches the breaking point before the man strays. This happens when they request for him to do some things which require considerable expenditure of effort, time, and/or money, whereas they don’t do the things he requests of them. After pointing this out, they will usually try to make up by smiling and being sweet. This makes some men really turn their view towards a smile and sweetness as an ugly smile and sweetness — tricky.

I see too many farang friends who support their gold-digging Thai girlfriends and wives for neurotic reasons, in my opinion. The unstable relationships seem to outnumber the solid ones.

Honesty and openness are vital to a good relationship. However, they are not sufficient for a great relationship.

Other attributes such as being pretty or handsome, lovely, cute, charming, etc., are common and get the relationship started. However, over time, these traits fade in terms of motivation to keep the relationship going forward. If there aren’t some strong values and interests that you both have, then the relationship is doomed to either separation or unhappiness. (Some people value a trophy wife or subserviant maid, and if that’s enough for you, then disregard the rest of this.)

It’s my goal in this article to address the above issues in the context of having a Thai girlfriend. I know this article has a lot yet to be written on the cultural elements, but human nature is pretty much the same everywhere, and I wish to emphasize those elements which I see as key elements over and over with guys I know who have Thai girlfriends and wives, and issues I’ve had over and over myself.

By “relationship”, I don’t necessarily mean a wife. There are relationships where both sides find each other interesting and mutually benefit and learn for awhile. Some Thai ladies like to learn the foreigner ways, just as you may find Thai culture and its differences from your own to be interesting. Many Thai ladies also benefit from exposure to the lifestyle of a foreigner due to his higher spending power. They go to nice places for dining and entertainment, watch expat friends in action, and basically you’re a “walking farang entertainment center”.

But what’s in it for you?

• “Love” and affection
• Assistance in living in Thailand where you learn things (translations, explanations)
• Homemaking (laundry, shopping, good food), save you time and hassle
• Work – outside income or helps you with your business
• Intellectual input and stimulation (analysis from a different perspective, news, research, etc.)
• Sex
• Loyalty and security (especially during times of financial or other difficulty, though you might get dumped during financial hard times)

Homekeeping and work may be inversely proportional. If she works, then you should have a maid, though she should manage the maid if you live in Thailand.

The usual woman’s story is that her boyfriend/husband is a “butterfly” (“chao-choo”) and that’s why it failed. Blame the man. Save her own face. In Thailand, saving face is very important, and even if she’s not telling the whole story, maybe it’s better to accept being as the scapegoat and moving on. To do otherwise, and make her lose face, may be dangerous.

However, the question is this: If the man is a butterfly, then why? Is it his fault or her fault for him being unfaithful?

Maybe he’s a stupid man who just goes after young, pretty, sexy girls with little value for other traits. If so, then why does he want a girlfriend, as valuing sexual variety is incompatible with having a girlfriend. She’s also made a mistake in choice of mate. Notably, I don’t think that all the sex entertainment is too much of a temptation for a marriage, as a man really doesn’t get quality fulfillment from entertainment girls, and if he desires to partake, he really shouldn’t take them seriously, either, just a ****-and-forget fling for a couple of hours or so, and he’s stupid if he’s not discreet enough.

However, when it comes to a serious relationship on the side, often it’s her fault for not earning her mate’s loyalty.

Here is a common experience in Thailand: A man meets a lady. He gets serious because she expresses that she has common interests. He tries her out for a partner in life’s daily things, and she gets an opportunity. What happens?

Once she thinks she’s “got him” (after the first few weeks, maybe a month or so), she expects him to take care of her, while she does less and less to take care of him … or herself. She sits around watching TV, yacking on the phone with friends, and reading trash magazines. On Internet, she doesn’t do valuable things but wastes time on surfing elsewhere, e-mail with worthless friends and chat. Trivial fun is fine, and everyone does it themself just like everyone else. But not all the time. It must be mixed with worthwhile, fulfilling activities.

I must emphasize: Most hi-so Thai ladies would not go to a place like this, though some will (especially if drunk). If you can’t or don’t want to take them home, then it is much safer to try to bring them to a normal hotel or, if you can afford it, a fancy hotel or resort! The Thai word for this kind of hotel is “rongraem monroot” (= hotel draw-curtain).

Short time hotels are recognizable by their parking spots, though most people have no car. The curtain is pulled when the room is occupied. You can’t even see a license plate, which is the idea — privacy.

Most are really basic on the inside. Almost everyone says the one below, PB Hotel (formerly Playboy Hotel), is better than average by Sukhumvit standards. There are suburban ones which are much nicer, with theme rooms and all. Sukhumvit hotels are more geared for quickies with prostitutes, whereas suburban ones cater more to established Thai couples who want a nice place to spend some private time together.

Note the mirrors on the wall, and there’s also one on the ceiling above the bed (not shown). What do you think the chair on the left is for?

An elevated TV is standard, and most places offer x-rated videos on one or two channels for free. In the old days, it was for an additional fee, and some may still do that. Some suburban ones have a CD player.

Alternatively, this place offered a radio tuner and indirect dim lights of different colors. Unfortunately, no jack to plug in a mic or line-in from your handheld player.

I’ve sometimes stopped in alone at these kinds of places for a daytime nap after lunch or between engagements, as inner rooms have no windows, are pitch black and quiet. Most are air conditioned. If you’re working late, you can sometimes stay overnite (until noontime) for around 400 baht depending upon time you enter.

However, you are not given a key to exit and return. Go only when you’re ready to shower and sleep. Some don’t have good blankets, so I kept one in my trunk, along with pajamas. The air conditioners are sometimes stuck on ice cold. You’ll need other amenities, too. They provide only a towel and usually soap and toilet paper.

Check out the room before deciding.

If I avoided this subject, or told people what they wanted to hear, then I wouldn’t be discussing Reality.

I’m not promoting prostitution, or Thai ladies, and I get no benefits from them. I have a guide to Thailand, and people are reading my website because they are already interested in Thailand. The Thai girlfriends section is just one section out of many about Thailand.

Third, this is the human experience, and consenting adults are free to do whatever they wish, as long as it doesn’t impose on anyone else. If you feel that you are being imposed on, well, it’s a big world and it is easy enough for you to go elsewhere to avoid this.

You can’t change the world to be what you want it to be. It is better to accept the things you cannot change, and be tolerant and understanding. This is one of the good things about Thai people which makes this country so nice — Thai people are tolerant. It is impolite to criticize and talk badly about people who are doing no harm to others. In the Land of Smiles, Thai people are understanding, compassionate, and not prone to arguments, relatively speaking.

I am a relatively nonjudgemental person. I try to understand the human experience and the great variety of people in this world, which includes what goes on in the expat concentration areas of Thailand. I try to help people. I have a background as an analyst. Also, I have a lot of compassion for people, and I try to understand a wide variety of people very different from myself.

Often, what’s right for me is not best for them, and vice versa, though I do try to understand others, and often in my work and social life I learn a lot vicariously. I like to learn and understand. I’m not going to tell other people how they should run their lives. That goes for both foreigners and Thais.

Yes, there are a lot of prostitutes. Most of them come from very poor backgrounds, mainly from “Isaan”, the poor northeast. Try living there. Try making it in this world with a farm background and the standard 6 year government education, at a country school. Try having the option of working on the farm or else for $100/month in a factory doing monotonous things for long hours 6 days a week.

If you don’t want the free market of prostitution to exist, then what are you doing to create an alternative solution?

I’ve also had my experiences with western high society “matrimonial prostitutes” and ladies “dating rich guys”, i.e., women who are attracted only to rich and successful men, both directly (though I never married one) and vicariously via many friends and associates. What’s the difference between that and having an ex-bargirl Thai girlfriend?

I’m not saying either one is bad. Different people have different options, and it’s all consensual between adults.

If some guys want to come to Thailand and have Thai lady, or many of them, that’s their choice, and the ladies’ choices. Most of the guys and most of the ladies are not so stupid and naive as to not know the basic risks, consequences, and benefits of these encounters, though they may not fully understand what’s involved or each others’ cultures and behavioral norms. I try to help the guys understand. (Also, I help the ladies understand when I talk with them, but they don’t read English language websites, so I’d waste my time writing for them.)

Contrary to some complaints, I don’t think I encourage guys to do one thing or another. There are different ways to analyze one’s situation and options, and what a guy or Thai lady chooses to do depends mostly on their own values — what is important to them. Not your values. I’m not going to impose my values on them, and I think many of them would not think highly of arrogant, inexperienced and self-limiting critics.

Sure, I have my own opinions and preferences. A lot of that comes out in this website. You are free to have yours, too. But think twice before trying to impose your values on others.