Montreal Escort & Swinging

When you’ve been swinging for a while, the question of adding a little something more to mix is inevitable. And it’s not because you’re bored necessarily, but it can be because you’re just looking to crank up the fun a little.

And with all of the sex product stores and websites available, you might be wondering if toys are the route to go.

Good For Anytime

Not only can sex toys spice up swinging experiences, but they can also help you out when you’re on your own. Actually, some people find it rather arousing to watch someone pleasure themselves.

Or you can use it when you’re waiting to swing again.

Batteries Last Longer

When you’re trying to please someone orally, you may find that your stamina isn’t always at the peak of its worth. Using vibrators and other stimulators can help to keep the feeling going without causing your jaw to ache.

Also, there are products for men that can enhance penis stimulation.

And these toys can be used when your hands are busy doing something else so you get the best of all the stimulating words there are.

But I Can’t Reach

For places that go out of reach at times, you can use toys to assist you. Also, if you’re a bit hesitant to go certain places (anal play is one example), there are toys that can do the stimulating for you.

While you help out in other areas.

If One Of You Is Too Tired

Of course, if one of you is too tired to keep up the action, then a vibrator or other stimulator can keep going. This is also a good thing to have if one person is in the mood, but another is not.

Multiple orgasms are exhausting, so the less work that you need to do to help the other person achieve your bliss, the better.

Toys Are Good For You

This might be a bit of a stretch, but having an orgasm releases oxytocin into the bloodstream. This is a hormone that calms the body and prevents you from feeling pain.

So, heck, why not try a toy to do your own research.

Learning Curve

Toys can also be a great way to learn more about your partner or other person involved in swinging. By trying out new things together, you can build on the relationship that you’ve already begun.

Or you and your partner can try something out and then share it in a swinging setting.

What To Buy

One of the greatest things about the Internet is the anonymity. If you’ve never bought a sex toy before, you can go online and read user reviews as well as information to make the best decision.

You will see that there are many more toys for women than for men, but that doesn’t mean that men’s toys aren’t any good. You just need to try a lot out to see what works for you.

If at first you don’t find something that is pleasurable, then try again. Soon you’ll find something that will move you in the right direction and add a little something-something to your swinging experience.

There may come a time (though it’s not necessary) when things may become rough in your swinging relationship. And some of these times are unavoidable, while others can be prevented.

The Silent Treatment

I think that it’s in human nature to become quiet when something is bothering us, rather than to talk about things. Most often, you find that you get and give the silent treatment when you are upset about something.

I find that being silence is actually just a way for me to gather my feelings before I make any rash decisions or accusations.

But what if you are receiving the silent treatment, what then?

I suggest that attempt to contact the other couple and set up a time where you can all meet in a non-threatening environment. If you truly can not understand or imagine what is wrong, then you can even meet somewhere of their choosing.

Make the silent couple as comfortable as possible.

If you’re receiving the silence from your partner, you can do the same. Of course, most partners are able to talk things over when they begin to feel upset. But if something has happened, make sure to find time to talk.

Usually once you get everyone talking about what has been making them feel bad, you will be able to solve the issues and move on.

Jealousy And You

Being in a swinging relationship implies that you are working toward fantasies while still keeping your spouse as number one. However, in the beginning especially, you may feel as though your partner is having too much fun.

Again, you need to talk about it.

Say everything that is one your mind. Sometimes it helps to write it all down and then read it to your partner so that you remember everything.

Set up a situation in which they can only listen and not respond until you are completely done.

And when you are done, let them speak. You partner will probably reassure you and work with you to find ways to show you that they care for you more than anything.

Jealousy that goes unspoken is the harmful kind. In a solid relationship, it’s just a stepping stone that can be moved beyond.

When The Other Couple Changes Their Mind

Like in all relationships, there may come a point when things just aren’t working out for whatever reason. And you may want to move on for the sake of everyone involved.

This doesn’t have to be a difficult transition when you think of what you have gained from your interaction. Perhaps you have just learned all that you needed to learn.

Don’t take it personally. Say your goodbyes and wish each other well.

Of course, if you feel as though you would like to move to a different couple, then be sure to tell the current couple as soon as possible. You all want to be in the most supportive environment that you can be in.

So be sure to openly talk about the possibility.

Swinging is just like any relationship and it can have high points and low points. The trick is that you need to treat it like any other relationship—with respect and genuine concern for each other’s welfare.

A person who is just looking over swinging as a fun way to have more sex doesn’t understand the true meaning of this lifestyle.

Swinging is a way to explore your sexual fantasies and boundaries with the blessing and support of your partner. And by enjoying each other in this way, you enable better communication and deeper trust of your relationship.

But there are always ways to get your self into trouble.

There Are No Little White Lies

When it comes to a swinging relationship, there is no such thing as a little white lie. Each and every lie that you tell will become an issue. There needs to be a perfect atmosphere of trust and truthfulness in order to feel comfortable with each other.

And in any sort of future for the relationship among the group of couples.

This is really why the recommendation is that only strong couples get into swinging. The stronger the couple is, the more likely that good communication lines are already in place.

To think of it another way, you need to be sure that you can trust the other couple as well. At the very least your privacy may be compromised. At the most, you can be emotionally hurt.

Crossing Over Boundaries

Swinging can be a great tool to overcome any sexual anxieties that you might have, but there are limits to this journey.

For one, you can not assume that just because you want something to happen during a particular sexual excursion that the other person does as well.

Of course, talking about these boundaries ahead of time will help.

But you also want to stick to what you’re promised to do. Just because you think that you may be ‘helping’ someone overcome something does not mean that they are necessarily ready.

When someone tells you to stop or that they are uncomfortable, you need to stop IMMEDIATELY.

You will destroy a perfectly good relationship in a moment of weakness.

Keeping Quiet

On the other hand, the other person will not know about your boundaries unless you tell them ahead of time.

This is no time to be shy with another couple or with your own partner. Be clear and up front about the relationship that you are trying to pursue.

You may want to set up a specific time for everyone to meet up in a non-sexual environment. This is a great way to continuously have the lines of communication open for anything that may not be easy to talk about in a certain mood or setting.

Find a neutral place that is semi-private and give everyone a chance to talk. If there are problems, then address them at that point or discuss them and set up another time to figure out solutions.

When you don’t say anything, you are setting yourself up for problems.

Issues like jealously and anger can rear their ugly heads quite quickly when there is silence. But a little talking can do a world of good and keep everyone feeling good about themselves and their sexual power.

I like to think of foreplay as a delicious appetizer and a way to get things rolling. Now, there are plenty of ways to move this along, so let’s start with some ideas and you can be creative from there.

As we’ve talked about before, some of the best foreplay is in the setting itself, so make sure that there are candles lit, and every arrangement has been made for an interrupted evening of bliss.

Feeding The Fire

One of the ways to get the night started is to feed each other. While eating isn’t always the sexiest thing, being served can be.

If you’re two couples, you can reverse roles. The women can feed the men, or vice versa. Do this slowly so that you can look into each other’s eyes. Try to signal your intentions for the evening, and let the other know how excited you already are.

Chocolate dipped strawberries are a decadent treat.

You can also offer each other drinks or other light snacks. Food has a way of calming us and getting us ready for deeper contact.

You can also put the morsel of food in your mouth and offer it to someone else, but they have to take it without using their hands. Delicious.

Turning On The Evening

While I don’t suggest this for anyone that hasn’t already propositioned it, watching a sexy movie can be a great way to introduce a sexy mood.

Find one that appeals to everyone and something that isn’t too corny so that you’re laughing more than you’re becoming aroused. You may want to make suggestions among yourselves and then pick a few in case they don’t end up working out.

Dim the lights and watch the action. Perhaps you’ll want to copy the actors as you watch. Let the darkness cover any nervousness.

Starting With Your Comfort Zone

Another great way to start a little foreplay seduction is to take turns showing affection to your partners. With your own partner, kiss, touch, and caress them. Show them how much you love them and their faith in your relationship.

Then the other couple can do the same. Before you know it, you will all be enjoying each other at the same time.

Now, switch.

Try A Game

There are plenty of ‘dirty’ games out there that you can buy and play together. Try a naughty card game or striptease poker. Not only are these erotic, but they also can relax you into a seductive state.

And add in a lot of sexual innuendo and every ones in the end.

But this is just a sampling of things that you can do as foreplay. Of course, you can come up with your own versions of these appetizing starters.

Or if the heat is just right, you may not make it through them.

When you’re first starting out though, I highly recommend doing something to get the evening started in the erotic tone. Start with the usual conversation and dinner, if you’d like.

Then move to somewhere more comfortable and let the fun begin…

Most women reading this are thinking that they already know how to get ready for a date, and this is a similar situation. While that’s true, you may want to read this over anyways to make sure that some little details are attended to.

When You’re In The Shower

You will want to take a shower because a bath might make you sleepy for the rest of the evening—and you don’t want that.

Before you get into the shower, make sure that you have a razor, shaving scream, face soap, and anything else that you normally need. With everything on your mind right now, you don’t want to have to keep getting out for things that you have forgotten.

Wash your body very carefully first. You can scrub with one of those poofy sponges and some bath gel for a light, clean scent. You will want to use lukewarm water so that your skin doesn’t dry out too much.

Wash your hair carefully and don’t use too much conditioner. If your hair is generally clean to begin with, you may even want to skip this step. Hair that is slightly dirty is much easier to style.

After you’ve been in the shower for a while, you’re ready to shave. Shave your legs completely and don’t forget the underarms. Of course, you can omit these steps altogether for personal preference.

Another Shaving Question

Most women want to know if they should shave their private area completely.

This is completely up to you and your comfort level. One thing to note is that if you’ve never done it before this night, it will not end well. This skin is very sensitive and you could end up with a nasty rash.

If you are planning on giving it a try, you will want to start the process out a few weeks a head of time. Start by trimming the hair down and then go ahead and use a razor, depilatory, or wax (ouch). Or you can go to a salon to have this done.

A lot of men like the ‘bare’ approach, while other men prefer a half and half layout. It’s interesting to note that the less there is, the more excited you can get. Just a thought.

Dressing It Up

Get out your best lingerie ladies. This is the time for the ‘fun’ stuff that’s been sitting in your drawer. Or maybe you want to buy something special for the occasion. A nice bra and panty set is best.

Wear a nice outfit that is revealing, but in a classy way. You may feel comfortable showing a little cleavage, but you may want to keep it subtle when you’re wearing a short skirt.

Makeup Or Not?

Since it’s going to be an exciting night, you do want to put a little makeup on to make yourself look fantastic. Like the clothes, you will want to play up your best features.

A nice dark lipstick (if it looks good on you) is best with softer makeup on the rest of the face.

You may also want to consider waterproof and smudge resistance makeup to keep the look on until you get home.

It’s the big night (or afternoon, or morning), and you’re excited to get going. Hold on tiger, let’s stop for a moment.

First things first, you need to get ready for the other couple. This isn’t the time to go for a run, throw on a t-shirt and just go over to someone’s house for a night of erotic pleasure.

No, no, no. There’s a better way and don’t worry, it’s not going to take longer than a half an hour.

Cleaning Up

Although most of this information should be common sense, we’re going to go over it anyways. Your excitement might have clouded over some of the finer points of personal grooming.

Take a shower or a bath. A shower is fine.

You would be surprised at how many men think that being sweaty is sexy—uh, no. Your wife or significant other might think it is okay, but if you’re planning on being with anyone else, it’s best to err on the side of sanitary.

Take a nice scented soap and clean every area of your body. Work your way down from your hair to your toes. This way, you’ve hit everything and the water washed off all the soap completely.

Nothing is less sexy than a mouth full of soap.

Focus on areas that get dirty—hands, feet, underarms, and your private region. If anything might be licked, it needs to be exquisitely clean.

And if you have any areas that are rough, just throw a little unscented lotion there. Rough hands on smooth skin equal icky feeling.

The Question Of Shaving

When it comes to shaving, you want to check with the other couple to see if there are any preferences. Of course, if you already have a full beard, this isn’t the time to hack it off. But if you have some stubble, see if that’s okay or even welcomed.

If in doubt, go as smooth as you can on your face.

And as for any other shaving that you might question, some women may find it attractive for a man to trim their body hair. Again, this is up to you in the end, but if you know that there is a preference, it’s best to take care of that.

What To Wear

Many women or other men may not mind you showing up in casual clothing, but for the first few times, you may want to go for something a little dressier. Find a nice dress shirt or polo shirt and pair it with clean dress pants and nice shoes.

You’ll be amazed how much attention you’ll get for dressing it up.

Although you’re kind of on a date with an obvious ending, you don’t want to do anything that might change the outcome. And for beginners, you may want to show that you are respectful of another’s tastes as well.

And these rules can change. Down the road, you can go more casual or dress it up in a different way (cops and robbers, anyone?).

The adventure of swinging varies for everyone, but there are some general benefits that you can expect and should expect from everyone involved.

Still, I have to point out that swinging isn’t for everyone, so don’t take this list to a reluctant partner to try to sway them. Of course, you may want to leave it out so that they can peruse it at their own pace…

Confidence

As a woman, I can tell you that confidence isn’t something that comes naturally in terms of sexual activity. We’re taught that men are superior in this respect and that women should follow their lead in everything.

When you start swinging, however, you are thrust into a realm of being up front about your needs and your desires. It isn’t all about pleasing the man anymore, but it’s about getting what you crave, what you’ve dreamt in your mind.

Your confidence soars as you begin to find that you can be sexual with someone that you’re not used to and yet still pleasure them, as well as yourself. Your partner will notice for sure.

Body Image

Although this conversation is linked to women most of the time, let’s not forget about the men. While media and celebrity news make us believe that all women should be a certain size, men are equally as judged.

Men see ripped abs and chiseled cheekbones, and quietly think to themselves if they’re all that good too? Are their penises big enough?

When you’ve been with your partner for a while, you may fall into a sense of comfort about what you look like. They love you and that’s all that matters. When you begin swinging, that self-assuredness will be tested.

And you’ll win in the end.

This other person wants someone different. They’ve probably already seen you and complimented you on something. Talk about feeling sexually charged and gorgeous—and now you’ve got more than one person telling you that.

Some women might find that compliments from another woman are the most pleasing, as we all seem to be so judgmental in public.

Better Communication

Not only do couples find it easier to talk to each other before they even start swinging, but afterwards—the floodgates of talking are opened.

When you can talk about sex, sex with another person with your partner, or amongst your group, you can talk about anything.

It will make you more open in the outside world as well. Granted, you may not talk about your swinging with others, but you may find that you can be more self-assured and thus more willing to start a conversation with someone that you normally wouldn’t.

Increased Sexual Drive

Of course, I haven’t done any scientific research on this, but I can tell you from my own experience that your sex drive goes up—a lot.

It’s kind of like the snowball effect. When you get exactly what you want, you want it again, and again, and again. And that doesn’t mean that you want to be with the other couple all the time, but sex becomes more fun, more open.

You and your partner never had it better.

First of all, wife swapping is an older term for swinging, but it’s still found in articles and literature, so we’re going to use it here.

Swinging is a new way to experience your current relationship in the presence of another couple or single. You can be heterosexual, bisexual, or homosexual to enjoy this exciting lifestyle.

Who’s Swapping

Men and women from all walks of life are finding that wife swapping is something that appeals to them. Perhaps they’re been in a relationship for a while and just want to try something new.

Maybe there are sexual boundaries that they want to push through and you want to explore these with your partner.

Swingers are well-dressed, ‘normal’ folks that are looking for something more in their relationship, something that can bring them closer together in a fun and satisfying way. We’re not the ‘freaks’ that earlier stereotypes have made us to be.

And maybe this has been a fantasy for a long time that only recently the couple has decided to pursue.

The ages range from late twenties to mid-fifties and the sizes and shapes are numerous. If you’re into certain preferences and fetishes, then you’re also in luck because swinging can support those as well.

If you can think of it, swinging can do it for you.

Why We’re Swapping

We’re swinging because we want to try something new, not because we want to have more sex or cheat on our partners. In fact, swinging isn’t cheating at all.

Cheating implies secrecy and that there is something wrong with the act, but swinging is done with the full knowledge of the other partner. There are no secrets in swinging and everything is fully discussed before being done.

If anything, swinging brings you closer together because you can feel safe to try new things and support your partner as he or she is pleasured by someone else.

Where We’re Swapping

You can experience swinging just about anywhere these days. Most of the larger cities have their own swingers clubs or meeting places, while smaller towns have resources to find their own venues.

Many of the adult stores will guide you to swinging resources, but if they can’t help, then go onto the Internet for directories.

And if you’re a bit hesitant to go out and find other swinging couples, then you can always try the online swinging websites. Like regular dating websites, you will be matched up with other couples that are similar to your tastes and location.

Once you’ve found someone to swing with, then you can set up personal meetings at clubs or at your own residences.

And once you’re swinging, you can get even more creative with the locale.

You may want to try out going to an exotic (and erotic) destination and living out a dream vacation.

Swinging is the way that some couples find more gratification in their sexual lives and more strength in their relationship. If you’ve thought about giving swinging a try, then why not look into it?

If you’ve already been to the first base of swinging, then let’s go ahead and hit that home run. After weeks, maybe even months of slow, soft swinging, you’ve gotten comfortable and you’re ready to go.

Have you and your partner talking about what’s okay to do and what isn’t?

Each couple will be different in determining the rules of play when hard swinging, but here are some things to keep in mind or try for your selves.

Talk about your fantasies. Is your husband into watching two women, or are you ready to see your husband pleasure someone else? What do you really want to play out? Be honest when you talk with your partner.

This isn’t a bartering session; this is a time for you to lay everything out on the table to make sure that you aren’t hurting the relationship that you already have.

One of the worst things that you can do is not talk about the details ahead of time, and either feel pressured into doing something that you aren’t ready for, or watching your partner do something that you aren’t ready to see.

And talk with the other couple too. If you’re uncomfortable about fellatio or some other act, then say it.

You may even want to write out a sort of contract, and sign it.

Since you may not be in each other’s sight, knowing exactly what your partner will and will not be doing can set a beginner’s mind at ease.

Starting The Fun…

When you’re in the room with your new playmate, you want to try to make the scene comfortable. If you’ve talked ahead of time, this won’t be difficult.

You can start by talking or just moving closer to each other.

It’s amazing what a sexy environment can do as well. Maybe candles and incense can make for a sultry atmosphere, or maybe you just want to get down to business.

Start with exploring their body. Touch and feel each inch. Make compliments as you go, but don’t talk about comparisons. This moment is about the other person and making them feel special.

There will come a point when your bodies will figure out how to move with each other. Keep the other’s fantasies in mind.

Did they want you to try something in particular, or did they want you to surprise them?

If at any point you are uncomfortable or need to stop the festivities, then do so. Immediately.

This is not a game in the sense that someone wins and someone loses. You are working together to overcome sexual boundaries and fulfil fantasies. You both still have someone to go home with.

And if you want to continue the swinging relationship, you have to be able to trust each other completely.

At this point, if it’s been agreed upon, go ahead and have sex with the other person—careful to stay protected and safe. Savor the feeling of release of orgasm as you lie in someone else’s arms.

Savor the satisfaction.

When it comes to finding someone that you feel comfortable with, you usually take your time, right? Well, when it comes to wife swapping, that same train of thought applies.

There are certain factors that you should consider and weigh heavily as you choose someone to swing with:

Honesty

You need to find people that are going to be honest with you. These are people that tell you what their needs are, what they do not like, and what their fantasies are.

You want to see all of their cards before you play any games.

If you should catch them in a lie, then you will need to figure out if they are someone that you want to spend your time with. This is especially true when you are meeting someone online; as you want to be sure that you are not in a dangerous situation.

One of the red flags for a con artist is someone whose story changes as they talk with you. Perhaps they tell you where they live and then suddenly, they mention living somewhere else.

My advice? Get as far away as possible when you run into a liar.

Open Communication

When you’re being honest, that’s great, but can you talk about things as they arise? When wife swapping, there can be a lot of complicated issues that need to be discussed.

These can include jealousy, new fantasies, and roleplaying ideas, just as examples.

You need to be able to frankly talk about what you want and what you don’t want from your swinging experience. You’re human and your feelings may change on what you originally intended for the relationship.

Being able to talk through these shifts is vital to maintaining your swinging relationship.

If you feel uncomfortable in any way, take things slower. And if they still do not improve, it may be time to move on.

Similar Fantasies

You don’t have to share the same fantasies, but you may want to look for couples that are interested in the same things. Whether you’re interested in roleplaying or bondage games, you want to be able to share in these things.

On the other hand, you may want to keep particular fantasies for your own relationship as a way to show your commitment to each other.

Finding Matching Goals

Although you may not want to share every fantasy, perhaps you are looking to overcome some issues that you have with particular sexual acts.

If this is the case, then you may want to bring this up with another couple to see if this is something that you can all explore. For example, if you are a woman who is interested in touching another woman, then you will want to see if this is something that would be okay.

Of course, many men would jump at the idea of watching such a scene, but the other woman must be comfortable as well.

Finding the right couple will take time and effort, but be strict about things that are important to you and to a relationship in general. You’re sure to find someone that fits the description of swinging ecstasy.